Of all the emotions, anger is one my clients struggle with A LOT.
Not surprising since from the time we’re girls we learn that anger is bad.
- That we shouldn’t feel it.
- That if we express it we’re bossy, unreasonable, or too demanding.
- That we can be rejected for it.
- That it can hurt people we care about.
- That it can hurt us.
No one ever taught us what to do with the feelings of anger in our body, they mostly just judged us for having them.
And on top of that, seeing and experiencing so many UNHEALTHY expressions of anger, we can understandably become afraid of the damage, isolation, and destruction we’ve seen it cause.
So what’s the result?
We have a lot of confusion, misunderstanding, judgment, and inner turmoil around anger!
And our bodies are paying the price.
Anger is a big energy. When we judge ourselves for being angry, and try to suppress anger (or unconsciously suppress it), it causes stress, tension, and fatigue….and over time, chronic pain.
Have you ever judged yourself for being too angry, or lost your temper and felt bad about it afterwards?
Or maybe you never get angry, but you’re in pain?
Do you ever (or always) have trouble setting boundaries or prioritizing yourself?
Do you wonder why you’re so tired?
Do you feel resentful about anything, or stuck anywhere in your life?
If so, I’d like to introduce you to your new best friend…
Free flowing, healthy anger is potentially one of your most powerful allies in healing and pelvic pain relief.
It is an emotion whose primary purpose is to protect, preserve, and restore. Not only that…remember, anger is big energy. When channeled properly it is big energy that can be used to heal, to create, to play, and to work…to live!
Most women are understandably confused about how to feel anger, and because they don’t know how to feel it or be with it, they try to get rid of it.
Think about it. Most advice around anger centers around ways to “get it out” so it won’t “hurt you”…and to do that in very specific ways so it doesn’t hurt anyone else!
Your anger isn’t hurting you. Trying to get rid of it IS.
Instead of trying to get anger out of your body, learn how to be present with the energy of anger, so you can begin to use it…in healthy, positive, constructive ways.
You can start that by simply welcoming anger the next time you notice that you’re feeling it. Rather than expressing it, or attempting to suppress it, give yourself a minute to BE present with the sensations of it in your body.
Breathe and name those sensations. Where are they? What do they feel like in your body?
Notice how easy or difficult that is for you to do.
If you’d like to become an expert in harnessing the power of your anger (and all your other emotions) for healing and pain relief, I walk you step by step through doing exactly that in my Healing Female Pain program.
For now, I encourage you to get curious about your anger. Stop judging yourself for having it, and start considering that it may actually be here to help you.
Anger is a powerful and valuable emotion, that helps you set healthy boundaries, implement excellent self-care, prioritize yourself and your healing, speak up in constructive ways, stop taking responsibility for other people’s reactions…and the list goes on.
You deserve to welcome and honor all the parts of yourself. In my experience you’re much more likely to relieve pelvic pain when you do.