Do you ever feel stuck or have resistance to doing your mind body practice?
Do you find yourself avoiding feeling your emotions, making time for a pleasure practice, or connecting to your body?
Most of us have resistance to welcoming emotions and pleasure in our body at first, and during times of increased emotion or change – even when we want to and we know the benefits.
Because we’ve been absorbing messages our whole lives that it’s not safe or ok to be an emotional, embodied, sensual woman.
So what do you do when you want to reclaim your emotions and pleasure in your body but you’re having resistance to practicing the tools that will help you do that?
Instead of pushing through resistance (there’s a reason it’s there), start by observing.
When I help women work through resistance, what we start with is identifying the thoughts that are coming up about feeling emotions or pleasure in their body. There are common themes to these thoughts. Maybe you’ve noticed some of these yourself?
Top 10 false beliefs women have about feeling emotional and sensual energy in their bodies:
“It’s too overwhelming”
“I’ll get stuck.”
“It will take over.”
“I’m scared to discover what’s been buried.”
“I’m afraid my body/emotions/soul will tell me to do something I don’t want to do.”
“If I feel this something bad will happen.”
“It will ruin/take over my life.”
“It will never go away.”
“I won’t be able to handle it.”
Guess how often these things have actually happened in the past 13 years I’ve been helping women feel emotions and pleasure in their body.
Here’s what does happen when you reconnect with your emotional and sensual self….
Energy begins to flow. Uncomfortable sensations ease. You get unstuck. You feel more alive. You have more energy. You gain access to your intuition and emotional wisdom. You feel at home inside your own skin. You start to like yourself more and treat yourself better. You feel confident and safe. You begin having boundaries without even trying. You feel empowered. Your body heals.
The truth is that what REALLY happens when you reclaim your emotions and pleasure in your body is that you discover a river of bliss and goodness inside yourself.
If you’re facing resistance, first know that this is completely normal.
To get out of the cycle of pushing yourself or avoiding a practice altogether, get curious.
Remember that you are undoing the conditioning of generations of women before you who have learned to survive by not feeling – by leaving their bodies – by freezing – by abandoning themselves to take care of others – by becoming invisible.
This is big important work…for you, for all the women you impact, for the planet.
Honor the part of you that needs to go slow.
Begin by simply observing.
What thoughts do you have about feeling emotions or pleasure in your body? Write them down.
Now put on your researcher hat and do a little experiment.
What happens if you stay present with the sensation of an emotion or pleasure for just one minute?
If you survive one minute, the next time practice for two minutes, then five.
Do what feels EASY.
Your brain may tell you that this isn’t enough to have an impact, that it’s a waste of time.
Over time those baby steps build a foundation of safety in your body.
Your brain will learn that your emotions and pleasure are not only safe, they are beneficial. You may even start to look forward to your mind body practice and the feeling of being deeply connected to yourself.
Remember, your emotions and pleasure are not dangerous, bad, shameful or selfish.
They are your life force energy – the foundation of optimal health and wellbeing, finding relief and freedom in your body, and reclaiming your confidence and aliveness.
It’s worth taking the time to reclaim them, one baby step at a time, going as slow as the slowest part of you needs to go.